Sharing a Coke with my BFF

I spent most of the day Thursday praying.  In a corner of a gold encrusted chapel with Jesus at the center, these words came to me: "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides."  Mt 6,33.  Yes, I need to keep my perspective.  God knows everything and has a plan.

Friday I decided to stay here another week--in limbo at the Hotel Rio ;)  I said my prayers and then paid at the front desk.  Then I got an email for an interview "Can you come today at 2:00?"  Sure!  It was a Teacher-for-Hire sort of place and they had a couple of opportunities that sounded really good.  But as I did the numbers in my head I just knew it wouldn't be enough to live on and the schedule was spread throughout the day so there wouldn't be a chance of getting another job.  I declined graciously and left wondering how many more times I could wear my only nice dress before I'd have to pay to have it laundered.  Then I checked my email.  Three emails from jobs I thought were lost!!  One from a a school in a nearby city (I'd rather live in Puebla, but I grow less finicky by the day).  One that was only part time, but an easier schedule to work in something else.  And one from a job I'd turned down on Monday and then later had sent them a desperate-but-trying-not-to-sound-desperate email asking if the position was still available I would like to accept after all.  They didn't reply right away and since the school year starts Monday I thought I'd missed it.  It was the only full time job I've been offered.  Very dependable school, decent salary, housing assistance, one year contract.  But it's teaching 1st and 2nd grade English, which is something I never dreamed I would want to do.

Ok, I thought, I need to sit down and read through all these emails carefully.  And I really want a Coke.  I found a beachy little taco bar that looked something like home and chose a table at the back.  Reading emails.  Carefully.  Making notes.  Pros vs Cons.  Texting 4 people who could give me advice in this situation.  The waiter brought the Coke.  I poured some into the icy glass.  Ahhhhh so good and soooo sweet.  Waiting for replies.  No replies!  What could all 4 of them possibly be doing that someone can't text back right now?!?!?!  It's Friday afternoon.  Classes start Monday morning.  I have to make a decision.  Like. now.  Check my notes, sip my Coke, wait an agonizing three minutes staring at the screen waiting for a wise reply...

Then the gentle Voice, the one with a smile behind it asks "Why don't you ask me?"  Ah yes.  Duh.  I put my phone down.  So then?  What should I do?  Should I accept it?"  "You said yesterday that if it was still available you would."  I did, didn't I?  Ok.  Yes then.  So I sent the email saying definitely yes, "I will commit to one year, I will sign the contract.  Yes, thank you, thank you!"  I sat back with a sigh of relief, not quite sure what I was doing, but sure I'd done the right thing.  Grabbed my Coke to fill the glass, and that's when I saw it...

Share a Coca-Cola with Jesus

My entire being burst into JOY!!!  I had to stifle an exclamation of sheer happy surprise!  He'd been sitting there with me waiting patiently for me to ask Him, and there it was: the answer I'd been waiting for all week.  This whole week of constant praying Lord, please grant me patience.  And please hurry up!  No doubt He'd been thinking the same thing.  "Sheesh lady!  I offered you this job on Monday and it took you all week to accept?!?"  I don't actually think that's how God talks, but that's how I'd talk to me.  No, I would've given up on me by now! :)   At that point I could see His hand in it all along: the interview entirely in Spanish surprising even myself, the immediate offer the very first day I got here, how he'd led me to a special mass for those looking for work right after the interview, how I'd had no other offers even come close.  (Another teacher here told me that this was an amazing offer for a new teacher.)  So I had to ask myself  Self, why didn't you accept it right away?  Well, because it wasn't what I'd been expecting.  Ah, how often do I fall for that?  As if my imagination is greater than God's power.  As if my knowledge comes anywhere close to His wisdom.  As if!  "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer 29,11.

Moving Mountains

I've been in Puebla a week and still no job.  I thought I'd have one before I even arrived here.  It's tough.  I did meet the nuns that were at my parish, Mt Carmel, in February.  (Back when I first found out about Puebla, and then some nuns from here show up at my church!)  Well, actually I met their order.  Those nuns who were at Mt. Carmel live in Gilbert and have a ministry at St. Ann's!!  I have no idea why they didn't tell me that when I met them.  It's pretty funny.  Anyways, I tracked down the nuns here--they're Carmelite Missionary nuns, called them, and they went to their house to visit.  I explained who I was and what I was doing there and they decided that I am either very brave or mostly crazy :)  I assured them it's both!  They are looking for ways to help me--a job, a place to live, or a community--but haven't found anything yet.  So I am still at a loss.  And there's the trouble that I only have enough money to stay here another week.

It's now no longer possible to get a job with a school, since the semester starts on Monday.  And I've had no leads with private companies. I've contacted the ones I could find, but haven't had any positive responses.  Mainly because I don't have a work visa.  Getting a work visa is tricky and it requires going back to the US (or any other country, just out of Mexico) and getting the visa from the Mexican consulate.  I didn't know this before I came.  Actually I was told that most places don't care whether you have a visa or not, but even if you need to get one you can start working and go through the process while here in Mexico.  It turns out that is not true.  Imagine!  They make it s hard for foreigners to get a job!  ;)  So I'm considering going home.  (Don't get too excited, Mom)  I've made lots of contacts and have had interviews with schools and companies that are very interested in hiring me but since I'm already here without a work visa and the semester starts now the timing is bad.  From home I could keep looking, get the visa, and come back in January.  

But then there's the idea that God has something else planned and of course nothing is impossible through Him.  He is fully aware of my circumstances and He alone knows why I'm here.  So I guess I'll stay here another week.  I will keep trying to make contacts, hopefully find some Church events to attend and maybe an orphanage or homeless shelter to visit.  And I'll see where God leads me.  Maybe I'll buy a hat and a tambourine and starting singing on a corner ;)  I want to live with the poor, after all! :)

Please keep praying for me my friends!  I think I have never done anything that requires so much faith.  I'm constantly attacked by thoughts that I am doing the wrong thing and in the wrong place.  I've been praying to have just faith the size of a mustard seed.  And I realized that I am the mountain that needs moving.  Isn't that the case for all of us?  How can we expect to change anything before we change ourselves?  Before we move beyond our comfortable lives and go where we are capable of very little.  Where our only Hope is to Trust God.  Completely.   

Statue of the Sacred Heart of Jesus in the Cathedral, Puebla, Mexico

Back at it

Hola amigos!  I'm back at this blogging thing.  I was going to start a new one, but the task was too daunting, and I finally reasoned, "This is all my life, Brasil, home, Mexico..." so I'm just adding to the old one.  And the title "Love never fails" is always relevant :)  (1 Cor 13,8)

I haven't blogged in nearly two years, since I left Brasil.  Obviously my life isn't that interesting unless I'm in a different country.  And now I'm in Mexico because...well, because I believe this is where God wants me to be.  He's not terribly specific--as most of you may know--but He has led me here "to bring good tidings to the lowly and heal the brokenhearted." (Is 60,1)  Which started with me.  He healed me in Brasil and now I am trying to be His Love to others.

Long story short, my "meal ticket" is as an English teacher.  I'm currently in Tehuacan, Mexico and I've just finished an intense 5 week course student teaching and getting a TESOL certificate.  (Teachers of English to Speakers of Other Languages)  Now I'm looking for a job in Puebla, Mexico.  I chose Puebla, once again, only on faith.  God put this place before me and granted me more then enough clues that this is where He wants me now.  I'm going there tomorrow and staying in a cheap hotel.  I have a couple of interviews and a lot of leads.  Yes, I need a job to earn enough to survive and buy a plane ticket home for Christmas, but what I really want is to get involved with a charitable organization and help the poor.  Live with them, laugh, cry, love.  But even with this as my main goal I still need a job and a place to live.  Earlier in the week I was allowing some malicious worry to settle in me and so I asked a bunch of people to pray for me.  I couldn't find the right prayers for myself.  And then a couple of days later as I sat in the zocalo (main square) after mass, eating my breakfast, and gazing at this beautiful cathedral the Holy Spirit (aka my conscience) said "He's going to use you to answer someone else's prayer."  And with that, as with any revelation from the Trinity, the doubt and worry were washed away by Joy and Peace!  Use me! use me!!  Not something you hear someone joyfully begging everyday.  But that has become my prayer.  And I know it will strengthen me to go where I am called.  So manana I'm off to Puebla.  Holding tightly my Father's hand.